One thing

Okay, it took me far too long to finish this meme. But here it is. I'll get back to blogging regularly soon; this past week has been so busy! I stole this from Amy, so feel free to steal from me!!

One thing I won’t let my husband buy me: Well, there isn't anything I won't let him buy me, but he doesn't like to buy me shoes or pants because we never agree on the shoes (never, ever, even slippers as we found out this year) and the pants, well, are just hard.

One thing I would love to have, but I probably will never have: A passport. I can't leave the state very often, why would I leave the country?

One thing you will never find in my closet: An empty/organized shelf or floor.

One thing I would choose if I were having elective surgery: A nose job. I fainted about 3 years ago while getting ready for work, and now my nose is slightly off center. It bugs me.

One thing I love about my face: That it has eyes on it so I can read. Seriously? I can't say a lot here.

One thing that I love to do: Get everything done before dinner so that after dinner all we have to do is dishes and then have the whole night to do fun family stuff.

One thing I would like to change if I could: My inability to understand all things political. I am the most unpolitical person, and I am too easily swayed by personalities. I always feel so dumb when people talk politics because I'm not informed and uninterested in general.

One thing I would change as a mom: The way kids ignore you until you are on the phone. Really?

One thing I would do if I had unlimited money: Get a bigger house, pay off my family's houses, put away money for my kids college and give them trust funds so they would be set when they got married.

One thing I that I will not do again: Work full time. I hope, at least!

One thing that I would like to do: See the ocean this year.

One thing I could do without: My love of soda. I'd be a lot better off if I just couldn't stand the stuff. But Dr. Pepper - you have the key to my heart. Sorry Shane!

One thing I love to smell: I have to say I'm not really good at smelling (allergies) but my answer is: babies. Especially when they are newborn, and they are nursed. Nursed babies smell so wonderful!! Back at Halloween I was holding a baby that we are sort of related to. He is adopted, which is wonderful, but that also means he drank formula. And the formula is a special, expensive kind of formula for upset babies. I think it was the shortest span of time ever that I've ever held a baby, because I just couldn't stand his smell. Sad for him, because he was really cute, and his smell is no fault of his own. By the way: if you've ever allowed me to smell your breast-fed baby, I thank you.

One thing I would do if I won the lottery: See above "unlimited money" question. Add in lots of family vacations and traveling.

One thing that infuriates me: I'm kind of anal about my floor. It drives me bonkers when I clean my floor and kids track mud on it. Grrr. More than one neighborhood child has felt my wrath on a Friday afternoon.

One thing that I love about winter: Drinking hot chocolate on a cold night. Mmm!!

One thing I am addicted to: Dr. Pepper and Cafe Rio. Sorry, that was two.

One thing I pray for: My kids to be safe.

One thing I wish I had: Unlimited time, money, and resources. Okay, that is three.

One thing I would do again, regardless of the pain: labor. Well, I had an epidural. But it still hurt. I love being in labor, knowing that my babies will soon join me in the world. I love those two days more than any in my whole life.

One thing that I absolutely hate to do: Sit in the line at the carwash. Grr. Or the oil change place. Wasted time.

One thing that is weird about me: Just one thing? Well, I often find my rings in my bedside drawer in the morning. I went to sleep with them on, but sometime during the night I took them off and put them away. I do it all the time. Maybe my rings make me clausterphobic in my sleep or something.

One thing that I need help on: Scooping ice cream. I'm really bad at it. (Actually I'm just lazy and want to let Shane do it. He's fully aware of this fact.)

One thing I find most relaxing: Reading in bed. Especially when everyone else is asleep, and, if the book is sad, I can sob my heart out without anyone thinking I'm weird.

One thing that could get me in trouble: The internet on my days off. I can spend forever on it when I should be doing other stuff.

One thing that annoys me: When things come out of the dishwasher still dirty.

One thing I dread; therefore, don’t do very often: Paying bills manually. There is something so hard about sitting down and writing out checks and filling out address labels and stuff. It's the reason I do most things online.

One thing that I have learned, but still sometimes forget: That things will work out in the end and most of the worrying doesn't do much good.

Book reviews

I have a few book reviews to catch up on.

My Name is Asher Lev, by Chaim Potok

Since SDBBE is almost over, I can let finally review this book. I really, really enjoyed reading it. Asher Lev is an observant Jew who wants to paint. Before reading this book, I wouldn't have realized what a problem this situation creates. But most of art history for the past 300 years is Christian-based, which puts Asher in a unique and uncomfortable postition. His reality does not understand or include the symbols that Asher must learn to manipulate.

What struck me most was how Asher was able to maintain some sense of his religion even while immersing himself in a Christian world. He continues to pray, to attend synagogue, to wear the ritual fringes and locks of hair over his ears. I can think of few people who could keep their faith intact while immersing themselves in a world that is opposite to the one they are accostomed to. How easy it would have been for Asher to stop believing, but he didn't. That speaks volumes to me personally. I felt it was heartbreaking that Asher's culture simply didn't have the language he needed to really express his deepest feelings. A great, great book to help anyone understand the limitations of culture, religion, and human desire.

Time Traveler's Wife

I know, I've read this book every year for 5 years now. But I just love it. I love Clare and Henry, I love their love, and the world they inhabit. I've reviewed this before, so I won't bore you all again.

Excellen Women, by Barbara Pym

This was an interesting little book. I read about it on Special K's blog, and I'm glad I read it.

Mildred is a 30-something spinster living in 1950's England. She's carved out a comfortable life for herself, surrounded by church service, friends, work. Her life changes when she befriends a young couple who move into the apartment (flat, in English terms. I love that word!) below her. She is pulled into their world in ways she never would have imagined.

I liked this book because it plays on conventional beliefs about stereotypes: the unmarried vicar and his spinster sister; the spinster who everyone in the parish believes loves the vicar; the unmarried scholar who is the object of a married woman's desire. Pym takes each of these stereotypes and turns them just a little, so that you can see the human beneath the edifice. It is a great character study, and really good reading at the same time. I enjoyed it a lot.

Evidence of life before marriage

So, Shane and I have recently become addicted to Facebook. I know, I know, what is all the hype about? But, since Shane's joined up, it has been so much fun. We've had late night chats going with multiple friends and family, posted pictures, commented, found people from way back when, you name it. Now I wonder what we did before Facebook.

By the way, my friend Britt posted an awesome bit about Facebook and the five stages of death. Check it out.

Today, one of Shane's friends posted some old, old pictures on Facebook. Like 1994 old. And I didn't know that any existed of this particular Halloween event. It brought back some good memories of Wild Becky. The night in question, I might have stood on a table with Shane. And I might have done everything I could do to get him to kiss me (other than, you know, kissing him) while standing on said table. There might have been beverages that are not currently in my drinking repertoire involved. I don't really remember...:)

When I look back on this time period, I was doing everything I could to flirt with Shane. I didn't know if I liked him necessarily, but I definitely wanted him to notice me. I would do anything I could to get him to smile at me, and I didn't want those smiles to be directed at any other girl.

It makes me smile to think that there is a picture of the aftermath of said Halloween event. It is a mile marker I can look back on and say, it started then, the wanting to be with Shane. It was the time I realized I sure liked his friends a lot, and I sure liked him a lot as a coworker, and I noticed how hot that boy I worked with really was.

So, without further ado, here are the pictures. Red-hot evidence of how hot my husband was in 1994. And that he wore earrings and had big hair. Red-hot evidence that I used to have permed hair and wanted to be a hippie. The pictures aren't of us together, but were taken within minutes of each other.

Proof that we were young once. And that we had a life before marriage.

Putting the shoe on the other foot

Subtitle: Why buying shoes gives me hives.

I've mentioned how Thomas had a club foot when he was born. It is nothing short of miraculous that the kid has such a straight foot, considering how much time and effort went into it. One of the things that our wonderful doctors haven't been able to cure is the fact that he has different size feet. Read: almost two sizes different.

I was so surprised when Ben came along and he had two straight feet. We bought him his first pair of shoes in less than 10 minutes one cold December day in the Kmart (I really despise Kmart, normally. But. When you have in-store credit, one pair of shoes is as good as another for a 10-month old.) It was amazing, because I had struggled with buying Thomas shoes for over 4 years by that time.

It is an age-old debate. Do I buy shoes to fit the big foot, or do I try to split the sizes? Do I buy shoes from Nordstrom who will split sizes, or buy two pair? Every side of the coin has its pros and cons. So far, we have mostly fit the big foot. To his credit, Thomas has never once complained about how his little foot bangs around in shoes that are big. For one thing, his small foot is also wider than his big foot, so it wouldn't work to buy the size that fits his small foot length: the shoes would be far too narrow. But, having worn shoes that are always a little big on one foot myself, I want to cry when I think of him wearing a shoe that is technically 2 sizes too big. It makes me sad that he has to deal with this. And so it makes me shut down when Shoe Buying Time rolls around as it does every six months.

Time was up last night.

I almost just let Shane go himself. He knew what shoes he was thinking of buying, and he isn't inherently cheap the way I am (read: I pout when we buy shoes.) But we miraculously found a pair of skate-board type shoes for Thomas right upon entering the Famous Footwear last night. They had the right size. The flat bottom will hopefully encourage Thomas to walk flat on his foot, instead of on the outside edge. I loved the way they look; they were black, and there was also a white/gray pair for Ben (who, 3 1/2 years Thomas' junior wears 2 sizes smaller! The kid has gigantic feet!!). And they were half off. I love getting good deals.

But I realized (with help!) that my not wanting to deal with Thomas' foot differential translates to me being really cheap about shoes which translates to me being incredibly grumpy and unwilling at shoe stores. It isn't fair to anyone, least of all my sweet Thomas, who is the one who ultimately has to wear the shoes. I realized how selfish I was being over buying my kids some shoes.

So here is a resolution. I want to see beyond the price of the shoes to where I'm making my son happy by getting him so new shoes. Since shoes do technically have to cost something, and doesn't make much sense to buy shoes of poor quality when he has so many feet-related issues. I need to stop burying my head in the sand and deal with shoe-buying in a more positive light.

Thomas was happy last night. He loved his new shoes. He was excited to put them on this morning. Maybe their structure will help him walk better.

Those are the things I need to be remembering.

Going blue...

I have a confession. I sometimes wear blue eyeshadow.



My mom always wore blue eyeshadow. But she had blue eyes. And when I was little, I thought nothing was prettier than smearing blue eyeshadow above my hazel eyes. But then, back in the 90's when I actually wore makeup, I wouldn't have been caught dead wearing blue eyeshadow. It spelled everything that was 80's and lame; much to uncool for my wanna-be goth self. Hmph.


But I bought some new eyeshadows this year. And one of them is blue. And I feel a little guilty when I wear it. It's not like I slather it on so that you can really tell it's blue. But I kind of like it.


So I'm asking, dear internet readers, is blue eyeshadow completely innappropriate? Am I being too uncool for words? Or can I let the part of me that is still a little bit goth roll her eyes at me and then tell her to leave me alone? 'Cause it seems a waste to let new pretty makeup go by the wayside, right?

10 lists for 10 great years

10 things I’ve learned about Shane in the past 10 years:

1. He likes an organized closet. Whoa, daddy, does he ever!
2. He can sleep in the same position all night. That is, when he’s allowed and there aren’t any children in the bed or his wife isn’t snoring.
3. Whistling is as normal to him as breathing or walking. He’s happy when he’s whistling.
4. Watch out for when he hums. Especially when driving.
5. He can play the tickle game with my boys like there’s no tomorrow.
6. Breakfast burritos taste awesome when he’s the cook.
7. It takes him a while to get to know people, but once he is your friend, he’s your friend for life.
8. He likes to be doing stuff most of the time. If there isn’t anything to do, he will find something to do.
9. He’s really good at picking stuff out for the house. He has an artistic side that often surprises me.
10. He doesn’t like to answer the phone.

9 ways I’ve grown by being married to him:

1. He let me chose to live my religion my way. There was never any expectation of me being religious, so everything I’ve chose to do has come from a sense of wanting it, not being expected to do it. That makes me feel incredibly liberated in many ways.
2. That it’s okay to do things differently than the way I was raised. Meaning, I don’t have to make a lavish dinner for Sunday just because it’s Sunday. We can have baked potatoes and salad or corn dogs. It’s okay.
3. I learned that just because someone doesn’t agree with your or gets mad at you, they aren’t going to give up on you.
4. I can speak my mind. Kindly.
5. That there is a delicate balancing act that needs to be performed in regards to family of origin versus family of creation. I still need to work on this a lot, I know.
6. It doesn’t do any good to keep things that bother you to yourself. You don’t have to make a big deal out of things, but it doesn’t do anyone any good to sit and stew.
7. It’s okay to let “things” go, as it old baby clothes (within reason) and out of date car seats and baby baths. Holding on to those things doesn’t bring those glorious times back.
8. I’m a much better cook than I was when we married. He is very glad I’ve grown in this way!!!
9. Life does feel better when things are tidy. (I still need to work on this one.)

8 favorite memories since we’ve been married:

1. Returning all our duplicate wedding gifts and buying stuff that we really wanted with all the money, then taking it home to our tiny apartment and putting it all away.
2. We painted our house for sweat equity. His not-so-dependent uncle helped us. On the second night of painting, when the paint sprayer jammed AGAIN, we were left alone to paint trim in our living room. I’ll always remember that quiet night, our house bare-bones to the walls, the only sound our chatting and the swish of paintbrushes.
3. The runs that we used to take when we still lived in our aparment. With no kids, our runs were always together, and we could talk. It’s when I first fell in love with running.
4. The training runs we had when we were getting ready for our marathon. This might sound the same as the entry above, but these were different. Getting caught in rainstorms, out in the boonies on the Jordan River Trail, five miles from our car and the jacket I stuck on a bush. He’s normally a quiet guy, but during these runs, Shane never stopped talking, and I loved being the listener.
5. The days our babies were born. Just him and me sitting in the hospital room, him going to the same McDonalds both times, eating hurridly (not in front of me) and then coming back to stay with me. I loved how encouraging he was, and how he took care of me.
6. The times before we had kids, when we would watch tv all night, and he would lay in my lap and fall asleep. One time when I was pregnant with Thomas, we were eating Quiznos sandwiches and I got guacamole in his hair because he was laying in my lap. We laughed about it, and I washed his hair in the sink to get it out.
7. Putting in our front yard, listening to Counting Crows blasting from his jeep. I can’t think of the rhythm of raking dirt without hearing the Mrs. Potter song.
8. Introducing him to someone at our wedding as my “fiace,” and then getting to correct myself by saying, I mean HUSBAND.

7 things we like to do together:

1. Sleep. We are the sleepiest bunch ever.
2. Eat good food. Iggy’s, Chilies, Café Rio, Red Butte Café & it’s sister Desert Edge.
3. Run.
4. Play with the kids.
5. Read in bed at night.
6. Shop. Nothing we like more than new stuff!
7. Have dates at Barnes and Nobles, browsing books.

6 places we’ve been (this should be fun)

1. Las Vegas
2. Spokane
3. Lava Hot Springs
4. St. George
5. Lake Powell
6. Park City (whew, I was worried we wouldn’t have six!)

5 places I want to go with him:

1. New York
2. California (or anywhere with a beach)
3. Europe (one day)
4. Washington DC
5. A cruise

4 memories of before we were married:

1. We worked together, before we dated. We used to stand and lean on the counter of the copy center and talk about our weekends or things we were doing or our families or whatever. I used to proclaim to him, “I need a man!” but I would secretly wish each time he’d say, “Hey baby, take me, I’m available.”
2. The day I realized that I liked him, 2 years before we would ever kiss.
3. Going to Las Vegas together to pick up his my friend Rebecca, who was dating his friend at the time. It was a good trip. ;)
4. The first couple of dates we had once we got together in 1997. He deliberately did not kiss me for a few weeks, which was so cute and frustrating all at once.

3 hopes I have for the future:

1. Being able to stay good friends through all the ups and downs of raising kids.
2. Going on vacations together when the kids are grown.
3. Being awesome grandparents to our children’s kids.

2 things I’m grateful for:

1. That he irons.
2. That he encourages our kids to go to church with me, and helps me get them ready.

1 thing I want:

1. A date, tonight, on our 10th wedding anniversary. Thanks for staying with me through all these adventures. I love you lots, Shaney.

My morning in three words:

I heart endorphins!

(And whatever it takes to get them! ;) )